The True Maturity Level of Yami and Bakura
by MaliksTenshi13
Summary: Discontinued due to my computer crashing and losing all my files.
1. Yami and Bakura

The True Maturity Level of Yami and Bakura

* * *

What do you know? I got a story up for once. This is just a one shot on how I see Yami's and Bakura's maturity levels at times.

Yami: What is that supposed to mean?

Me: Nothing much. Why do you ask?

Yami: I want to know how you see me.

Me: Read the story. You'll find out.

Disclaimer: Don't own Yugioh. If I did it wouldn't be made for young kids.

* * *

Just another normal day of living with three crazy yamis. Yugi sighed as Yami and Bakura began to fight yet again. Ryou sighed as well.

"Will they ever get along Yugi?" Ryou asked.

"Doubt it. If they did I think Hell would freeze over," Yugi replied, not taking his eyes off of the game he was playing.

"Baka Pharaoh," Bakura yelled.

"Idiot Tomb Robber," Yami yelled back.

"Mr. Know-it-all."

"Where did that come from?"

"Your ass."

"Oh. Then I suppose that Ra really does shine from my ass as you have said before."

"I never said that baka."

"Yes you did."

"When?"

"Yesterday, at the park."

"Whatever. Ra would be afraid to shine out of your ass."

"It couldn't get out of yours."

"Why you little…" A loud smack followed.

"OWW, you bastard!"

"I aim to please."

"Do you say that to Ryou every night just before you"

"DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT FINISHING THAT PHARAOH!"

"Why? You started it." A pause followed. "Start with him?"

"Damnit Pharaoh, I told you not to finish that sentence."

"Too bad, I did. Do you think he enjoys it?"

"As a matter of fact he does. What does Yugi say when you take him?"

"THAT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, BAKA."

"You started it when you brought Ryou into this conversation!"

"Hey! Leave me and Yugi out of it!" Ryou yelled. Yami and Bakura looked over at Yugi and Ryou. Yugi looked ticked, but Ryou was pissed.

"Gomen Ryou," Yami said bowing his head. Bakura snorted.

"You're forgiven Yami. As for you Bakura, you get to wash the dishes, do the laundry, and," Ryou paused as Yugi whispered something into his ear. "And I will take away your game boy for a week." He smirked as Yugi and Yami laughed.

"NOOOOOO! Not that Ryou, anything but that," Bakura begged. Yugi and Yami laughed harder at the sight of the oh-so-mighty Tomb Robber groveling at his hikari's feet.

Just goes to show, when your crazy yami misbehaves, take away his or her game boy.

* * *

Wellhope you liked it.

Yami:I did.

Yugi: Me too.

Bakura: I didn't. I would send you to the Shadow Realm, except that Ryou thinks that I need to take more responsibility for my actions and words.

Ryou: Well, you never learn.

Bakura: I shouldn't have to. I'm 5000 years old for Ra's sake.

Me: That's why you're what one of my friends calls "An Old Fart." Read and review please.


	2. Chapter 2

The True Maturity Level of Yami and Bakura

* * *

Yeah, I changed it. I got a few reviews asking for more so I complied. 

Yami: Do you like to pick on me?

Me: Why yes I do Yami, why do you ask?

Yami: It seems like I'm in all of your stories.

Me: Well, you're the main character. And you're not in all of my stories yet.

Bakura: Nah, she's just being nice now. When Marik and I are done she'll be as evil as we are.

Marik: Right.

Disclaimer: I don't own it. If I did then Bakura and Marik would be tied up in my room.

Note: Marik is the yami in all of my stories. This is no exception.

* * *

Chapter Two. Marik and Yami 

One week after Bakura lost his gameboy and was stuck with the chores, Yugi, Ryou, and Malik decided to meet at the park. Malik and Marik were the first ones there so they waited by the fountain.

"Hikari, I'm bored," Marik complained.

"Well there's nothing I can do about that," Malik said. "Hey, look there's Ryou and Yugi. RYOU, YUGI, OVER HERE!"

"Hey Malik. Why did you want to meet here today?" Yugi asked as he walked up. Yami was behind him glaring at Marik. After all he still didn't trust him after Battle City.

"No reason. I just wanted to get Marik out of the house before Isis kills him. Why did Yami come?"

"I was bored," Yami said.

"I bet you weren't bored last night Pharaoh," Bakura cut in smirking.

"If you start that again Bakura, you'll lose more then your gameboy this time," Ryou threatened.

"Yes hikari," Bakura muttered.

"What do you mean Bakura?" Marik asked curiously.

"Nothing Tomb Keeper," Yami spat.

"Shut it Pharaoh. Bakura if you please," Marik said.

"It isn't any of your business Marik," Yami growled.

"I SAID SHUT IT. DAMNIT PHARAOH DO YOU HAVE A WAX BUILDUP IN YOUR EARS OR WHAT?" Marik yelled.

"DON'T TELL ME TO SHUT UP ASSHOLE. I'LL DO WHAT I WANT, WHEN I WANT, WHERE I WANT, HOW I WANT, AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT," Yami yelled back. People were beginning to look at them and walk away as fast as possible.

"WELL I WANT TO KNOW WHAT BAKURA MEANT. IF YOU WOULD JUST LET HIM TALK, I WOULDN'T HAVE TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP!"

"WELL MAYBE I DON'T WANT MY SEX LIFE REVEALED TO YOU!" Yami realized what he had just said and slammed his hand over his mouth, as his eyes widened. He looked at Yugi, blushing bright red.

"Ohhhh, so that's what he was talking about," Marik said. "What did you do?"

"NONE OF YOUR RA DAMNED BUSINESS TOMB KEEPER!" Yami shouted angrily.

"You did something. What did he do Yugi? Do you senseless?" Marik smirked evilly.

"I'm not going to answer that," Yugi said turning red.

"Well, that answers my question."

"Shut up Marik. You have been nothing but trouble today. When we get back to the house you aren't allowed to use anything electronical and you're sleeping on the couch," Malik said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! PLEASE NO, I'LL DO ANYTHING! ANYTHING!" Marik cried falling to his knees and attempting to imitate Mokuba's puppy dog eyes. But on Marik, it just looked stupid.

"My mind is made up," Malik said grabbing Marik's ear and dragging him off.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow," Marik could be heard as he was dragged away. Yami was still red.

Yugi turned to Yami. "And for revealing our supposed-to-be-private life, Yami, you get to sleep in the basement, and no more Twinkies for a month."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY TWINKIES! PLEASE DON'T TAKE THE TWINKIES!" Yami cried begging. "My love, my aibou, my perfect angel, please don't take the Twinkies. I love you my precious, more than anything but PLEASE, I'm begging you, PLEASE don't take the Twinkies."

Yugi smirked. "That's not going to work Yami. You can beg and plead all you want, but your not getting Twinkies for a month. You may, however, continue to blow steam up my ass, as I'm rather enjoying it."

Ryou giggled at this. "Well we've got to go. I'll see you two later. Come on Bakura."

"I'm coming," Bakura said. "Hey, Ryou, when do I get my gameboy back?"

* * *

Hah! I'm sooooo evil. You can't beat that for being evil with much. 

Bakura: No kidding. Even I'm not that evil.

Yami: I wouldn't do that.

Me: I know you wouldn't. But I'm the authoress and what I say goes here.

Review please!


	3. Chapter 3

The True Maturity Level of Yami and Bakura

* * *

Wow! I can't believe I got another chapter up! I'm so happy! 

Bakura: And insane.

Just like you huh Kura.

Bakura: I suppose. More like Marik.

Marik: You called?

Yeah. Say the disclaimer Mariku.

Marik: Yamisgirl13 does not own Yugioh or any part of it. However she does own her Yami Tenshi.

Tenshi: Watch it Bonkoutsu!

Yami be nice.

Tenshi: Hmmph.

* * *

Yugi and Ryou

It was another beautiful day in Domino City and the yamis and hikaris once again decided to meet in Domino Park. They all remembered last time so Yami had tape over his mouth, Bakura was gagged, and Marik was gagged and in a straitjacket. Yugi was pulling Yami over to the fountain.

"I'm late! I don't believe I slept in today! Malik and Ryou are so going to kill me!" he wailed.

/It's not all bad aibou. It could be worse/ Yami said through the mind link since his mouth was taped shut. It was actually his idea to tape his own mouth shut so he wouldn't lose anymore sleep. Or Twinkies for that matter. After Yugi had given him back the Twinkies Yami had hidden them someplace he knew Yugi would never look. His underwear drawer.

"Yeah, I suppose it could be." _'I could've forgotten where we were meeting.'_

/Look. They're over there./

Yugi looked and saw Ryou, who was holding Bakura by the arm, and Malik, who was holding Marik by the ear. Marik was making whimpering sounds. After all, Malik had a very strong grip and rather long nails. "Hey Yugi," Ryou greeted. "Your late."

"Gomen nasi, I know I'm late Ryou-kun. I'm sorry. So what are we going to do?"

"Well Malik and I wanted to climb that tree and finish building the tree house," Ryou said.

"Great! Let's go! do we have supplies for it?"

"Yes. They're already at the tree." The three friends walked off, their gagged, and in Marik's case bound, yamis behind them. When they got to the tree Malik shot up and pulled Yugi up with him. Ryou climbed up on his own. They discussed the plan and eventually got to work. Ten minutes later Yugi and Ryou started to argue.

"No Ryou it goes here. See, the diagram says that this goes to the left of the long plank for the railing as part of the wall," Yugi said.

"No, it goes over here. It's the support beam for the roof," Ryou argued.

"The diagram says it goes here not over there. Look at it and you'll see I'm right."

"I'm not going to. I know I'm right and you're wrong."

"No, I'm right."

"No, I am."

"No, I am."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too."

"Not!"

"Not!"

"You are too right and that's final!" Ryou paused for a moment. "Yugi-kun that was a cheap trick. That was cheaper then Bakura."

/I'm not cheap/ Bakura snapped through the mind link.

/Keep out of this./ "Really Yugi, that wasn't fair."

"Well I am the king of games and that, my dear friend, was a game. So the beam goes over here."

"It does not!"

Malik sighed. "Here we go again." He butted in. "ARE WE EVER GOING TO FINISH THIS?" He bellowed.

Yugi and Ryou stopped arguing and looked at him. "Gomen Malik," they said simultaneously.

Malik looked at the diagram. "Besides, you're both wrong. That plank is supposed to be cut up to make cubicles for our Millennium Items."

Yugi looked at Ryou and Ryou looked at Yugi. "Gomen nasi Ryou-kun," Yugi said.

"Gomen nasi Yugi-kun. You're forgiven."

"You too."

Ryou smiled. "Me too."

* * *

Well what did you think? I hope you enjoyed it. 

Tenshi: They better have enjoyed it. Draws a dagger, waves it threateningly

Now Tenshi what did I say about threatening potential reviewers?

Tenshi: Sighs Don't threaten. They won't review.

Bakura: Well at leat the Pharaoh was shut up in this one.

Yami: You called Tomb Robber?

Bakura: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Marik: Review or face the wrath of Marik, Malik, Bakura, Tenshi, and Hikari.

That's me. My name is Hikari:) Please review.


	4. Chapter 4

The True Level of Yami and Bakura

/Hikari and Tenshi arguing by the computer/Ryou and Bakura busy in living room/Yami and Yugi bored as hell/Marik and Malik busy in Hikari's room right behind her/

Hi everyone. This is Hikari and I typed this up at 3:54 am. Pretty early but I got all of my sleep. Marik, Malik, keep it down will you? I'm trying to write.

Tenshi: Turn that damn music off. You know I hate this song.

Yes well I like it and you're off topic. Sorry, we're listening to Angels.

Tenshi: Play Powerless next Hikari.

Okay! I love that one! Anyway here's the next chapter. Disclaimer please, someone.

Yami and Yugi: Hikari owns Yugioh in her dreams. If she owned it in reality we'd be in trouble.

Don't you know it. Enjoy the tale of psychos.

* * *

Chapter Four Marik and Bakura 

Marik, Malik, Bakura, Ryou, Yami, and Yugi had met at the park under the sakura trees for a short time. The lights wanted to duel and the darks… well they wanted to be entertained.

"Hey Marik did you get the newest issue?" Bakura asked.

"Yes I did. did you Bakura?" Marik replied.

"Yeah. What did you think?"

"I ordered one."

"Hey me too! Mine came in today. Ryou wasn't pleased."

"Malik wasn't either. Did you bring it?"

"Yes." They pulled out their new toys. "Hey mine looks bigger then yours."

"Trick of the light Bakura. Mine is definitely bigger."

"No mine is. It's longer then yours."

"Length isn't everything Bakura. It's how you use it that counts."

"Nah. Width is everything. The wider the fuller if you ask me."

"Mine is still bigger in length and width."

"No it fucking isn't Marik. Mine is far larger then yours." People were staring and backing away from the two yamis. Parents were covering their children's eyes so they wouldn't see anything bad.

"Mine is bigger then yours and I can prove it." Marik pulled his out. "See? It's bigger then yours."

"How would you know?" Bakura said pulling his out. "Mine is far larger."

"No it isn't."

"Yes it is."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes." Soon they started yelling.

"NO."

"YES."

"NO."

"NO."

"YES AND THAT IS FINAL!" Marik blinked. "That was cheating you cheap thief."

"That was low you psycho," Bakura countered.

The hikaris cut in right then. "Oh shut up," Malik said as he walked up and took out a measuring tape. He measured Bakura's and Marik's toys. "Bakura's is bigger by far."

"Hikari you're supposed to be on my side," Marik whined.

"Well I would be if yours was longer and wider. It isn't larger then Bakura's is."

HA! MY FLAMETHROWER WAS BIGGER!" Bakura yelled with glee.

* * *

Well that's it for today. It is now 4:21 am and I'm not tired. 

Tenshi: I can make you tired.

0.o I don't go that way yami, sorry.

Tenshi: Damn it Hikari I was referring to your Lunesta.

Oh. Well in that case nope. I can't take a double dose in twelve hours.

Tenshi: damn hikaris think they know everything. /Continues to mutter./

… Feed me? Please?


End file.
